Understanding Healthy Sexual Behaviour in Children

Every child irrespective of their age will show some or the other forms of sexual behaviour. Understanding healthy behaviour can enable you to be aware of what is going on with your students and set the content of your sexuality education class accordingly.

Note: It is a common myth that children do not have sexual feelings or are not curious about sex and sexuality. In fact, all children are sexual beings. It would be wrong to say that all kinds of sexual behavior by children is ‘abnormal’.

Healthy Sexual Behaviour Between the Age of 0-4 years

– kissing and hugging
– showing curiosity about private body parts
– talking about private body parts and using words like poo, susu, bum, nunu etc
– playing “doctor-doctor”, “ghar-ghar” (house) type games with other children
– touching, rubbing or showing off their genitals or masturbating as a comforting habit.

Healthy Sexual Behaviour Between the Age of 5-9 years

– kissing and hugging
– showing curiosity about private body parts but respecting privacy
– talking about private body parts and sometimes showing them off
– trying to shock by using words like poo, susu, bum, nunu etc
– using swear and sex words they’ve heard other people say
– playing “doctor-doctor”, “ghar-ghar” (house) type games with other children
– touching, rubbing or showing others their private part

Healthy Sexual Behaviour in Pre-Teens (10-12 years)

Children at this age get more curious about sex and sexual behaviour. This is expressed through:

– kissing, hugging and ‘dating’ other children
– being interested in other people’s body parts and the changes that happen in puberty
– asking about relationships and sexual behaviour
– looking for information about sex, this might lead to finding online porn
– masturbating in private.

Healthy Sexual Behaviour in Teenagers (13 – 18 years):

Sexual behaviour becomes more private in teenage. Healthy sexual behavior includes:-

– kissing, hugging, dating and forming longer-lasting relationships
– being interested in and asking questions about body parts, relationships and sexuality
– using sexual language and talking about sex with friends
– looking for sexual pictures or online porn
– masturbating in private and experimenting sexually with the same age group.

(source:- NSPCC)
(image source: The Ephemerist)

For a more comprehensive understanding of the various developmental stages that a child passes through, click here.

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